'Life is just beginning' and 5 more signs of aging
'30.10.2019'
Source: lady.mail.ru
While nothing hurts you, you don’t think about age at all. And then something suddenly happens - and you understand that everything, not a girl already.
Columnist lady.mail.ru Julia Verklova indulged in thoughts about age. Here are the conclusions she came to.
Children grew up
For the first time I was informed that I am getting old, in the comments under the article about getting to know my parents.
“This is an acquaintance with my old age,” wrote attentive readers.
Not that it was a complete surprise. For the first time with the thought “if children have become full-grown adults, it means that we have become completely winter”, I encountered, it seems, in the 1989 year at a big bard concert. Boris Vakhnyuk said so from the stage ...
I was still in the position of an adult child, and the phrase seemed to me just beautiful. And then - oops! - I'm already completely winter. And, it seems, missed the fall. You live, you live, you ride with your teenagers like a young dragonfly, and suddenly it turns out that winter rolls into your eyes.
Once upon a time, at the dawn of my journalistic career, I dealt with the topic of the development of children's intelligence. And then one venerable psychologist explained to me that with each new child the level of “maturity” of each member of the family is reduced, because you have to “condescend” to the youngest - to aguk, sysyukat, learn to read. All relatives are adjusted to each other - and the level of intelligence of each corresponds to the average age of the family. It is necessary to add the age of the mother with the age of the father and all the children and divide by the number of family members. If you recalculate according to this formula, then I will have 33 ... But who recounts!
It seems to me that we live in a time when the age of the parents is approximately estimated by the age of the children. A friend of mine recently was surprised to learn that I’m 10 years older than her. "I," says, "thought we were the same age." We are not the same age, we are the same age children!
My colleague gave birth last year. I knew that she was 39, and always perceived as an adult respectable person. And now for me she is a young mother (that is, not at all adult and solid), and I constantly restrain myself so as not to teach her life.
Do you want to look younger
I personally have problems with external perception: I have never in my life by eye been able to determine neither the age nor the nationality of anyone. Of course, I distinguish Europeans from Chinese. But Germans from the British are unlikely. And the Chinese from the Koreans - even more so.
In the same way, I distinguish infants from children, children from adolescents in puberty, women of childbearing age from postmenopausal women (with men, by the way, it’s more difficult) - but that’s all. 35 or 45 years to someone - asking me is useless. It seems to me that this is basically useless since Botox, fillers, and fractional thermolysis were invented.
On the subject: What does the skin need in 30 years so you do not think about age
Therefore, when someone says: “I am 40, but I look at 25,” I get lost. For me, 40 and 25 are about the same thing — an adult woman.
And if for some reason this woman reports that “she doesn’t look at her age,” then she is at least not happy with her age, he doesn’t like her ... So, she considers herself old and hopes that others do not notice it.
Life is just beginning
This is a heavy form of the previous paragraph. From the side it is perceived approximately as “I am still hooded”, and, most likely, pronounced for self-consolation - at the moment when you realize that many opportunities have already been missed.
You already have 30, and you have never once jumped from a bungee.
"No, it can not be. Life is just beginning, I'll go jump. " Not everyone jumps. Yes, almost no one jumps! But most of the 10 years still convince themselves that life has just begun and we still have time with the bungee.
To 40 you find out that you haven’t jumped from a bungee, you haven’t gotten married. And life is just beginning again - and therefore, another is ahead. In 50, participation in the half marathon (or rather, nonparticipation) is added to the lost bungee and marriage - and life begins again.
In fact, you can jump from a bungee, run a marathon and get married without looking at your passport at all. I wanted to - jumped, went out, ran. But - the most important thing! - all this can not be done. And also at any age.
You are young soul
If it is impossible to determine the age of the face and body by eye, then the alien soul is completely dark, as you know.
But if a person claims to be young in soul, then he no longer even decides to say that he looks at 40 in his 25. And in general, he says, “old age is not a state of the body”, hoping that no one will look into the soul (and if it does, it will prove nothing anyway).
In fact, old age - it is, the state of the body. Young people care about the body: they intend to use it actively (including for reproduction) - therefore it is important for them to be well-controlled, not let down and not hurt. As soon as you decide that the body is already out, but the soul is young - it's old age. Even if you are 20 years old according to your passport - old age is all the same.
Friends are leaving
This is really a shock that deprives gradualness in awareness. Nowadays, the boundaries of age are blurred, and there are no general rules: this year I raised a toast to the health of young people at the wedding of my 40-year-old friends, and last year I congratulated my first-time 50-year-old colleague ... And then, bam! - and a classmate’s funeral.
When peers die - not in war, not in car races, not when scuba diving, but from a heart attack or cancer - you suddenly realize that life is passing. In the most literal sense.
On the subject: Woman for 40: six things you can do for the first time at this age
Appears “forever”
For adults, there is nothing eternal and unchanging. It is in childhood that you can memorize the multiplication table “once and for all”, and in late puberty you can also fall in love forever.
As you grow up, you comprehend the dialectic and forget how much 7 × 8 will be. The variability and unpredictability of life is more entertaining and pleasing than frightening and upsetting. And even for the tenth year sitting in the same office or the twentieth year loving the same husband, you are aware that everything can change at any time.
But once, some wise woman tells you that in her house "quiet joy has settled forever," and you suddenly acutely realize that the lady is not young. And “forever” - this means approximately “until the end of life”, which is already a little.
It seems to me that a lot of people have sharply grown old after the Moscow rallies and elections in September: “Well, everyone, people say, is now forever,” and they sigh like old people.
Belief in “eternal values” is also age-related. If someone says that Alyssa Monks is not serious, and Edward Munch is forever, I understand that a person is aging. Moreover, when an adult grabs a book of Zhvalevsky from a child’s hands and palms off the “eternal classics” of Kataev. Or does the computer take away at all, broadcasting about the magic smell of paper books ...
It’s normal to love Munk and Kataev. It is strange to believe that everyone is obliged to love them and always. Life is changing, and if you do not change with it, you become obsolete.
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