'I was born a boy, but I am a girl': how a five-year-old transgender child lives
'29.10.2021'
Source: Air force
Louis * is a five year old boy who loves to dress like a girl. In 2018, Luis's parents allowed him to walk in women's clothing through the streets of their town, which is located in the state of Santa Catarina in southern Brazil, says Air force.
Soon, someone called and complained about the hot line of the Ministry of Women, Family and Human Rights.
The man, who did not want to be named, said that Luis' parents were “pushing him to dress like a girl,” which resulted in him being bullied at school.
The prosecutor’s office immediately took up the matter.
“It was a big blow for us. The situation seemed absurd to me, ”recalls Luis's father, Cesar.
"Behaved like a homophobe"
A police officer by profession, Cesar rethought his views on gender issues after his son began to wear women's clothing.
“Before, I used to act like a homophobe. But I reconsidered it all, - he told the BBC. "I realized that jokes and comments can be very offensive."
Louis’s mother was also shocked by the complaint.
“It was a very difficult situation. Most of all I was afraid that someone would offend him, ”says Maria. He and Cesar broke up, but continue to raise children together.
The prosecutor’s office conducted an investigation in an attempt to find out if Luis’s rights had been violated, and ultimately concluded that nothing of the kind had happened.
“The parents firmly and confidently explained that the boy himself gives an obvious preference for girls' clothes and jewelry, without pressure from third parties,” the prosecutor's office stressed.
On November 27, 2018, the case was closed. Louis's parents did not tell him about the investigation.
“He is still small, and there are things that we think are still inappropriate to devote him to,” Maria explains.
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Psychologist's advice
Louis often asks to be called Louise, parents say. At their request, we use the pronoun “he” in this article to refer to Louis, since the issue of gender identification is at an early stage in their family.
Cesar and Maria are convinced that this is only a matter of time, and sooner or later, Louis will need to be addressed only as a girl.
Two years ago, Luis's parents decided to seek advice from a psychologist and came to the conclusion that their son is transgender.
“He said he didn't want a beard and he didn't want to be a man,” Cesar recalls. "He started asking for clothes and accessories for girls."
Cesar shared with the BBC that it was initially difficult for him to understand his son, but he always tried to respect his will.
“We have mostly men in the police force. Everyone expected me to put pressure on my son. But I'm more liberal and respect his wishes, he adds. “Many people thought that I would be ashamed of my son, but I am very proud of him.”
Cesar and Maria allowed Louis to wear female jewelry such as bows and hairpins when he was three years old.
Invisible cases
Alexander Saade, a psychiatrist and expert on gender identity, notes that factors such as the toys the child plays with do not determine his gender identity.
“What makes him transgender is the fact that he or she does not internally correspond to the gender with which this child was born,” explains the psychiatrist.
A child can begin to show signs that this is happening to him, from the age of three, adds Saade.
“It depends on the particular child. But at this stage, they begin to show who they are and what interests them. It's all observable, ”he says.
Saade insists that examples of transgender children have always existed throughout human history, but they have not been given due attention.
“Many of these cases were - and are - invisible,” he adds.
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Future
Cesar and Maria have not yet made any decisions about Louis’s potential transgender transition.
They believe that in a few years, their son will want to legally change his gender and begin hormonal treatment. “But we haven’t thought about how we will do it yet,” says Cesar.
In a short conversation with the BBC, Louis himself expressed joy at the fact that his maternal uncle began to accept him for who he is.
“He supports me now,” the boy said of a relative who, he said, was religious and did not initially understand why Louis was wearing women's clothing.
Louis realizes that it’s hard for people to make his decisions.
“It's because I'm not like everyone else. I was born a boy, but I'm a girl, ”he says. - But it's not a problem".
Now, in 2020, Louis hopes that what he dreams of the last two years will come true: he will be able to wear a uniform skirt at school.
“I believe the time has come,” notes Cesar.
Yes, the police father is afraid that his son may be bullied, but he is absolutely sure that he must respect the decisions of his son.
“He's a wonderful and intelligent child,” he says. "I am very proud that I have such a daughter."
Louis himself, not yet aware of what difficulties may await him in the future, is already making plans for him.
“I want to be an inventor or a model,” he muses.
* The names of the heroes of the material are changed at their request
