The article has been automatically translated into English by Google Translate from Russian and has not been edited.

'I just wanted to breathe, and I could not': diary of a 37-year-old Florida woman who died from COVID-19



Florida woman kept a detailed diary during her fight against coronavirus, says the publication Unfortunately, she failed to survive.

Photo: Shutterstock

PJ McClelland, a resident of the US city of Brandon, Florida, was only 37 years old when she was diagnosed with coronavirus infection. That day she began to lead в своем блоге detailed diary. Here is what it says:

March 26

... Yesterday I was tested for the virus, because my neighbor got sick, and I have ALL the symptoms. In Hillsborough County, a verification code is required for verification. Testing is carried out only in Ray J (at our football stadium).

In the first tent, they give me a surgical mask and a coronavirus information leaflet, check my name and phone number to call with the results.

In the second tent, they told me ONLY to remove the mask from the nose. The lab technician sticks a cotton bud a good six inches into my mouth. Yes, it’s really so unpleasant that you can’t even imagine. And that’s all! They will call in a few days with my results.

When she was about to leave, there were already 300 cars in the parking lot. I’m worried that not all of them will be able to check today ...

March 28

I have tested positive for COVID-19. I have already contacted everyone who contacted me, and now, too, should be checked.

I'm getting worse every day. It feels like I have migraine, bronchitis and flu at the same time.

If you are sick, watch your temperature rise quickly. If it reaches or exceeds 102 ° (approximately 39 degrees Celsius - Approx. Ed.), go to the hospital! Please PLEASE keep social distance and #StayTheFuckHome !!!!

Do not worry about me. I am relatively young and healthy. I’m worried about the people I met. It pains me to think that I could infect them.

I was prescribed azithromycin. This is the only drug currently recommended by the Department of Health. The mood is good, I feel comfortable at home.

March 29

The temperature rose to 102,2 (a little over 39 Celsius, - Approx. Ed.) I called Brandon's hospital and asked if I should come. While waiting for half an hour on the phone, chest pain returned and shortness of breath appeared. The nurse told me to hang up and immediately call 911. When the ambulance arrived, the paramedics wrapped me in several blankets. They said that they would not provide any medical assistance in the car, but would just take me to the hospital.

The hospital immediately isolated me. The temperature decreased, but the chest pain intensified noticeably. I got an ECG (normal result) and a chest x-ray (I’m waiting for the result).

Everyone here is afraid of me, but I don't blame them for that. The doctor is friendly. And the nurse is not. She acts like I deliberately brought her the virus.

Everything is fine with me, except for the high temperature. Oxygen is low, but they don’t give it to me additionally.

March 30

Okay, I lied. Because of severe chest pain, I was assigned to computed tomography. There has already been a line, I try to be patient. It’s also very cold for me.

I did CT with contrast. Oxygen rose to 94%. The results of X-ray and CT came - everything is clean. I was taught to use an inhaler and sent home.

My case is the first confirmed infection in our area and I am REALLY worried. NONE of the medical staff had adequate protective equipment. They didn't have N95 masks. On the door of my ward, three announcements were placed at once with the inscription: “Call. Do not come in". And my phone number.

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2 April

I'm exhausted. I sleep all the time. I alternate water and Gatorade (drink. - Approx. Ed.) constantly, but still feel dehydrated.

My head hurts much more today. It is almost unbearable. I have some caffeine, sometimes it helps.

This week I was lucky enough to make an appointment with my psychologist. She was terrified as hell last night - not being able to breathe would scare anyone. The incompetence of the nursing staff at Brandon's hospital further increased my stress.

I really didn’t think they would let me out.

To quote a few words said to me by a nurse and a doctor last night:

Nurse: "Where is your dropper?" Me: “I don’t have it. Paramedic said that they will not be able to provide me with medical care. ” Nurse: “Great! Now I have to do it! ” Doctor: “What exactly do you want us to do for you, ma'am?” Me: "I want to stay alive."

I had rather severe chest pains and shortness of breath, which is why I called the hospital. The nurse I spoke to said that I should start using oxygen immediately. And she added that while I can speak normally, I do not need to come to the hospital.

Finally, I managed to sleep a little, but still not enough. I feel as if I have not slept for a week; the feeling that I sniffed out a mountain of cocaine (I have no idea how it is).

Never in my life had I felt such attention to myself. I even cried several times because of this. I may have to remain in quarantine for another 25 days, but I haven’t communicated so much with people for the past 10 plus years.

I want to say THANKS TO ALL HEALTH CAREERS AND ALL OTHER WORKERS !!! I hope you are all as safe as possible. I wish you all love and light.

Photo: screenshot

3 April

Sorry, but there will be no sun and no roses. The cough and headache get worse. I'm pretty damn exhausted, but I can't sleep. I'm only sharing this because I think people need to know what "minor cold symptoms in a few days" mean. I have never felt so sick. I am writing this through tears….

The voice is coming back. Hooray! But the cough is terrible. Chest pain decreased, as did temperature. I promise that my next post will be more optimistic!

As soon as I recover and be safe, I will hug all of you. I have parties with an overnight stay and with hugs. But the thought that I can’t touch people for at least another 25 days is frustrating.

The inhaler definitely brings relief. For those who asked: I was not prescribed chloroquine.

4 April

I'm tired. I woke up at three in the morning from the fact that I could not breathe. I had to take an inhaler and xanax, because I experienced a terrible panic attack. I called my mother, she reassured me. Gods, how I love her! Today was the worst day. Wheezing, shortness of breath and an almost constant cough.

Huge greetings to my brother Ronnie, who came to visit me and stayed in the backyard. WE WERE XNUMX meters apart ALL TIME !!! It was wonderful to see a native living person.

Hopes that this will end in 14 days have long run out ... Dr. Fauci said some people would be "seriously ill in a few weeks." I am one of them ...

I have run out of all the medications I need. I called the doctor and asked if they could give me something to ease my symptoms. I was told they were saving chloroquine for "really sick patients." But if I COME to them, I could prescribe something else. It's an hour and a half in one direction, and I barely have the strength to climb the stairs to the bedroom.

The doctor said that I should be on oxygen 24/7 until I have other symptoms. He also said that I would be very sick for several weeks (I suspected that, but still ...).

I again asked for a chloroquine recipe, as the FDA approved it today. He said that this drug is given only to patients in the intensive care unit, for which, essentially, all hope is lost. Yes, now I would like to receive this medicine, but still I am very, very grateful that I am not in this position.

The last thing we discussed was this: if the situation continues to deteriorate, do I want to be put on a ventilator (this is damn scary). I asked if they save or just prolong life. He said the odds are 50/50. I was always a strong-willed person and always trusted in my health. I do not want to take any emergency measures. However, she chose ventilation of the lungs (hoping, of course, that this would not come to that!).

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5 April

I did not quit smoking completely and smoke up to ten cigarettes a day. Before getting sick, she smoked an average of about 40. I consider this a victory. I have no idea why I can’t fall asleep ...

6 April

I woke up panting from vomiting. I’m awake and very exhausted.

Yesterday I saw on the news that from 100 to 250 thousand people would die in the United States if we did not keep social distance. I have said this before, but I will say it again: # STAYTHEFUCKHOME !!!! I still see people on my friends list who don’t take it seriously. Listen, stupid bastards, do you want this? !!!

The doctor ordered a zofran for me at the pharmacy and they will deliver it to me tomorrow. It doesn't make me sick at all, but it only costs $ 0,82, so hell yes.

This afternoon I took a pretty decent nap. And she began to wheeze less. Thanks to the inhaler! The doctor ordered me to go to the hospital if it gets worse, but I will try to avoid it, if at all possible.

Sorry to end on a sad note, but the doctor spoke again about mechanical ventilation (which is unlikely, but possible). I decided that I would not use this device for more than two weeks. I have a will to live. It is VERY unlikely that I will need it, but a decision must be made right now.

Today there has been a serious turn for the worse. I wheeze, I have a cough and low oxygen. I called the doctor, he prescribed Levacvin, prednisone and a nebulizer with albuterol every six hours.

I’ll end up on a happy note: my cousin, whom I never met or even talked to, asked my friends to pray for me. I am an atheist, but the thought that almost a hundred people send me love and prayers made me smile.

Some ask what medications and doses I am taking. These medicines are for specific symptoms. I do not want to give advice that can ultimately be harmful or fatal.

7 April

The heart hurts for everyone who is working now. Don't forget about the gas station workers - they are in the same danger as the grocery store employees, if not more.

If your children get bored, ask them to write thank you cards to medical professionals. It will be useful for both children and doctors.

Today was my worst day. If not for the nebulizer, I would return to the hospital.

Everyone I talked to is 100% healthy. My breathing recovered to 75% of my lung volume. Thanks to the old gods and new ones for my nebulizer!

Last night I had a nightmare. I will not go into details. I’ll just say that I fought for my life. I pray and do not believe that it was an accident. I'm afraid to fall asleep again.

The cough is relentless. Still looking for a heart rate monitor.

Received a cough medicine for $ 11 around 27pm, but I would gladly pay much more! This thing is divine nectar from the Goddess of Breath.

I have 3 friends who have identified positive tests. I send them rays of love and light. If anyone gets a positive result, bring your ass to my house! You can come to relax in my patio with me. The Department of Health assured me that it is safe, my patio is quite large, and you can socially distance yourself in it. This is the only help I can offer right now. Please feel free to contact.

The therapist calls me every day. He's great!

I coughed nonstop. Literally. I could not breathe. Almost at all. Just a sigh between coughs here and there. I have a constant panic attack. I lost my peripheral vision. I know that you ask why the hell I did not call 911. I do not know if it was due to a lack of oxygen, fever, exhaustion, or something else, but I was extremely confused / disoriented. I can’t explain exactly how terrible the test was: I just wanted to breathe and could not. It was, without a doubt, the scariest thing that ever happened to me.

The doctor said I should call 911 immediately if coughing and wheezing come back. He also said that he was worried about pneumonia, so he would send me for a chest x-ray.

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8 April

I have a lot to say and very little time. I slept only 45 minutes, I again had a nightmare. Absolutely exhausted and damn afraid.

Although the frequency of coughing has decreased, the pain from it is not like anything ever experienced. This makes sleeping almost impossible.

Remember me, I love you one and all. However, nothing can replace hugs for me - you know how much I love hugs. It's been 24 days since I had physical contact with anyone. And now, according to a new order from the health department, the quarantine will last another 7-9 weeks. I will not be able to leave home, except for a trip to a doctor or hospital, otherwise I face arrest without bail. But apart from the CVS pharmacy, which serves patients with COVID-19, I did not go anywhere.

The doctor prescribed me cough medicine with codeine! I just took the first dose and really hope to get some relief (and sleep!). He also found a laboratory that exclusively served patients and patients suspected of being infected. If I don’t have a sharp improvement by Thursday, he wants me to do a chest x-ray and get a blood test to check for pneumonia. I seem to be getting high quality medical care.

Need A Break and Catz Italiano not only brought me all sorts of goodies, but also sat (very safely, at a distance and masked) with me on the back porch for an hour and a half. I knew that I needed to see people, but I didn’t even realize how much it was needed ... In fact, I feel calm for the first time since it all started. I am almost happy. I can never thank any of you for the love that you showed me at this darkest time for me.

A cough medicine with codeine really helped. This is a huge victory. I still have a long way to go, but I think everything will be all right. Tomorrow I’m going to donate blood and take another X-ray. I will report the results as soon as I receive them.

April 9 (day 21 of illness)

I can confidently say that these were the longest and worst three weeks of my life. I have to stand for another 1-3 weeks. Then another 6 weeks of quarantine. I know I’ve said it before, but it’s worth repeating: I’m one of the lucky ones. I still cannot say that I left the forest, because I saw too many cases when people got better in the morning and died the next night ...

I THINK about the energy that will be needed to take a shower and go to the pharmacy. I’m sure that I’ll sleep well tonight. Lol

I love you all!

This is the last post by PJ. She died two days after leaving this record.

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