Moving to the USA: how to help your child adapt
'16.07.2018'
Even if you do not have a family yet, moving to another country causes tension and stress. What to say about those traveling not alone, but with children? The “headache” of parents is connected with the search for a kindergarten or school, with adaptation in a multicultural environment and, of course, with a new language for the child. How to prepare for change, so they are less painful? We talked about this with psychiatrist Vilor Shpitalnik, who has vast experience in helping immigrant families.
ЫЗЫК
A new language is the last thing that parents need to worry about, as children master it much faster than adults. If the latter study a foreign language with words and rules, then the child has his own approach: mastering the blocks, sentences and expressions.
“If there is an opportunity to teach English in your country, it would be much better,” explains psychiatrist Vilor Shpitalnik. - This is so that the child at school does not feel like a stranger at first. There are different methods: comics, pictures, TV screen. Children find it easier because they hear it better. And they perceive it faster. It is believed that naturalization in the language of the level of people born here occurs somewhere before the age of 13-14 ”.
So, if you “have time” to move up to this age, then there will be no difficulties with this. Problems may arise elsewhere.
COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS
The first time there will be difficulty in adapting to the relationships in the classroom. Adults need to ensure that the child does not feel like a stranger or at some other, lower, level.
“We need to prepare him so that he is not ashamed of his origin,” the expert advises. - Explain to him that America is a country of immigrants, and all classmates are, in fact, children and grandchildren of immigrants. And that this is not shameful, but, on the contrary, a reason for pride. "
The school system in the United States is such that it is very easy for students to get involved in multiculturalism. As a result, they become satisfied that they get the opportunity to talk about their homeland, customs and traditions of their native country. Thanks to this approach, adaptation occurs quickly.
Another serious pitfall: children are very prone to pressure and influence from the company - whether in the classroom or on the street. The most important thing is to warn them against drugs, alcohol, smoking and criminal activity. It is important not to miss the moment, because parents, having moved, go headlong into building a new life.
COUNCIL TO PARENTS
How should adults behave so as not to lose trust between them and the children? How to help the family to adapt in the "new life"?
“First of all, it is patient work, which implies discussion and the fact that the child should trust his parents and treat their opinions with respect,” says Dr. Spitalnik. - He is a friend of father and mother, not just a son or daughter. Delve into your children's problems. You have to constantly talk: ask how he is at school, what kind of friends he has, how he feels, what interests. Always emphasize that he is a family member. You are all one. And that the child's problems are your common problems. "
About expert
Vilor Spitnik - Psychiatrist, doctor of the highest American category. He graduated from graduate school in Moscow, where he received the degree of candidate of medical sciences, and then continued his education at Columbia University in New York.
