Don't scare or scare the 'evil uncle': an American parenting approach that surprises immigrants
'14.10.2020'
Source: Yandex Zen
Shouty kids in public are always annoying. But Americans are very loyal to such antics of kids, writes the author of the blog "Reckless America" on Yandex Zen.
A small cozy cafe. Next to our table is an American couple of years 70. Quiet music pours, the waiter hurries with a plate of crispy salad. The owner of the restaurant addresses with a welcoming speech.
Suddenly.
- Aaaaaaaaa! Rarararaaaaaa !! - A boy of about four with a frantic cry runs across the hall. Stops at a table with an elderly couple. Fiercely tugs at a woman's chair. Out of nowhere, a girl with curly golden hair runs a little younger. Clings to this ill-fated chair.
- Rararaaaa !! - already together they yell, shouting both the owner’s voice and quiet music. Stronger and stronger. The howl of little sirens is growing.
At this moment, an American woman in a beige suit, sitting on a chair, with which they fiddled so hard, finally turns to the children.
I freeze. The clouds seem to be gathering.
She turns and ... She smiles dazzlingly. The children are silent for a second, and then screaming away to the new victim. She becomes a dark-skinned man of about 30. Who also smiles in response to the howl of sirens.
Children are plenty of plenty and run to the table to eat. Their parents affectionately chide.
On the subject: How does the child protection service work in the USA and why you can be taken away from your child
It would seem an isolated situation. But with enviable regularity, it was repeated over and over again. Children and places changed, but the essence remained the same. Strangers, whose peace was disturbed by a strange child, did NOT comment on him. On the contrary, they only smiled. Of course, some parents tried to calm down their children. But it looked like a very feeble attempt.
For me, it all looked very unusual. How is it that an unknown woman does not promise to take with her a screaming child who does not obey her mother? Doesn't he scare your uncle cops? And the most important thing is that his parents don't even pull him down? Do not threaten to give that formidable aunt over there?
I think the reason lies in the freedom and personal boundaries that are so important to the people of the United States.
Strangers do not interfere in someone else's family, even if they experience some discomfort from the actions of someone else's child. And parents strive to give more freedom and not to infringe on the borders of their child. Perhaps the birth of a child after 30 also affects: Americans only by this time have a family, the first-born often appears in 32-35 years. And from this it becomes even more long-awaited and special. Who wants to give all the best, and not to limit in anything.
As you can see, this approach often leads to loud howls and the clatter of small running sirens.
Of course, I do not claim that this is exactly how every American family brings up a child. But this freedom simply cannot but catch the eye. On the one hand, the desire to raise a child brave and willing to explore this world is understandable. And on the other ...
Original column published on the blog. "Stupid America" on Yandex Zen.
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