When Steff Barnett first met Lynn, he called himself Steve. Sometimes he liked to wear women's clothes, which his wife did not mind. Many years later, Steve realized that he was actually a woman living in a male body. After 45 years of marriage, when their two children grew up, Steve turned into Steff and had a sex change.
Now 65-year-old Steff lives as a woman, and although 62-year-old Lynn has always been “heterosexual heterosexual,” they decided to stay together and continue to live as a family. Bristol live.
The couple admits that there is no physical intimacy in their relationship and they have had to go through a series of hardships associated with change. According to Steff, Lynn "misses her husband desperately, even now."
“My guilt was terrifying, I thought I was going to disappoint Lynn, but I love her passionately even now,” Steff says. “She stayed with me and was brave enough to do it, even though she actually lost her husband.”
Lynn commented, “I can't get into her head to understand how she thinks. And she cannot be me to feel my loss. I knew there was no turning back, but I loved Steve enough to know that this was the only way for Steff. ”
The couple met when Lynn was just 16 years old, on the first date they went to the cinema. Soon, both fell in love and got married in which two sons were born. After the birth of children, Steve admitted that he liked to wear women's clothes, and Lynn took it in him.
Hearing Steve says he was born in the “wrong” body, Lynn thought it was about intimate life. She was not worried that her husband liked to wear stockings or a skirt, as this did not happen all the time.
At that time, Steve had never heard of gender dysphoria and tried to abstract from his own gender issues while the family was raising children. He did nothing with himself while his sons were growing up, because he feared for their psychological comfort and did not want to be “bullied” in the playgrounds because of the unusual parent.
In 2013, he decided it was time to change something.
“We've had three years of talking and trying to figure this out,” Steff explains. - I was afraid that I would lose everyone. But I don’t think I would be here now if I hadn’t made this transition. ”
Steff notes that 40-45% of transgender people either make the transition or are trying to commit suicide.
“On Valentine's Day, I went through an operation, walked out with Lynn and just screamed with joy,” Steff admits. - I took my first breath on the street - and that's it. It was a very emotional moment. "
According to Steff, she really misses intimacy, but Lynn is not ready to take such a step: “She had to go through the loss of her husband, and then I had to go through the loss of my wife.”
Lynn admits that she misses the male hands that hug her.
“I hate to admit it, but I am outraged that this woman (Steff) took my husband away from me, and after so many years of struggle I had to accept, because I lost the battle,” she says. "But if you love someone deeply enough, you push yourself into the background and do your best to help that person."
According to Lynn, Steff loves hugs and kisses very much, loves holding hands, but his wife cannot overcome herself and go towards her husband, who has reincarnated into a woman. Nevertheless, Lynn admits that her marriage remains sacred, and the names of Steve Barnett and Lynn Hogan are indicated on the marriage certificate.
“For me it will always be like that,” she summed up.