Maria Shriver: how the ex-wife of Schwarzenegger survived the death of her parents and the betrayal of her husband
'03.06.2021'
Source: Woman hit
Over the years, the former wife of Arnold Schwarzenegger has learned independence and the ability to be alone with herself, writes Woman hit.
For most of her life, Maria Shriver has associated herself with the role of daughter, wife, mother and everything else from the Kennedy / Shriver family. But after several heavy losses - the death of her parents and uncle, a break with Arnold Schwarzenegger - she "zeroed out" and opened a new chapter in her life. WomanHit.ru publishes a translation of Maria Shriver's interview with Oprah Winfrey.
“Before I go to bed, there are a few books I turn to to calm down and feel comfortable. I recently added a new book to the list by Maria Shriver. This is a spiritual chronicle of her personal journey towards a deeper understanding of what her role on Earth is. Yes, Maria noted, she, like all of us, struggles to meet the unknown with courage and openness. I have been friends with Maria since 1978, when we worked at a Baltimore television station. So the get-togethers with her were more like a bachelorette party than an interview when we compared notes on aging, grief, personality, politics and her own definition of happiness, ” — Oprah explained.
Опра: Maria, when I was preparing for an interview with you, I read every page of your book. She is so well thought out. I like the way it unfolds from chapter to chapter: “I am what I decided to become,” “See the jewel inside,” “Work on the Power of the Spirit,” “The power to part.” You think a lot!
Maria Shriver: When I travel, communicating with people, I understand that everyone seems to be thinking about the transition process or are already in it - they think about global issues in the same way as I do. They tell me that they just graduated from high school and are worried about what will happen next. Or they just graduated from college and don't yet know what their calling is. Women tell me that they left their careers to raise children, and they cannot understand who they have become. If they want to return to work later, they are not sure they can. Like me, some have recently lost their parents or separated from their spouses. Or they are worried about what is happening in the country. This is a huge upheaval in consciousness, and people are wondering how to understand it.
- People are looking for a direction. They seek their rod and staff, as in the Bible.
— What is good about all this turmoil is that it leads to excellent conversations. People want to communicate - they want to feel the joy of it.
“You told me you had a campaign to promote the book, and you were shocked at how many people came.” You thought you were in the wrong place! It surprises me.
— I got used to the crowd, but not to those who came for me. I'm more used to being invisible.
On the subject: Arnold Schwarzenegger came to the prom of a handsome bastard son. A PHOTO
- What do you mean by "invisibility"?
— Well, in the past I did not speak out on behalf of myself. I had to speak on behalf of others - I encouraged people to vote, treat Alzheimer's, and help people with disabilities. But I did not talk about what bothered me myself and what I grieve for. In the book, I shared more with what was happening to me. It’s hard to show your vulnerability, but it’s also nice.
- Why do you think so?
— Most of my childhood I felt bewildered, because there was always a "Kennedy", without my own name and identity. People asked me: “Who are you from Kennedy?” I always felt that they were more interested in what was before me than getting to know me. Therefore, she was determined to become Mary.
“Your mother also fought this.” Her brothers took all public attention, no matter what great things she did. She passed away in 2009. What was it like to be her daughter?
— That was great. But at the same time, it was difficult, because she thought that everyone can change the world, and she was not interested in you if you did not strive for this. She dressed like a man and had pencils in her hair. She smoked cigars, carried a briefcase and went to the office every day. She loved power and respected people who worked without interruption. It made me hold the bar.
“You talked to your mother every day.” Gail with his mom. I wonder what you were talking about?
— I didn’t even take a step without her approval. Talking to her reassured me like nothing else. I heard that you become a full-fledged woman only when your mother dies. From childhood, I was worried that I could not survive without my mother, but I could. And I'm proud to have survived. I am proud of the fact that I am a softer and more open person.
- I remember that in 2004, when the news was full of headlines, I was on vacation in the Bahamas, and you were on vacation in California. I was lying on the boat, and suddenly a woman in a bathing cap swam nearby. She grabs the side of my boat and says, “You have to do something for these people! No more time to rest. You and Maria could start a fundraiser. " It was your mom.
— I told her, “I can't believe you did it!” After all, she called me to say the same thing: "You and Oprah must move on!" Growing up, we did not take a real vacation. If somewhere and went with the whole family, then with some kind of official mission. It was exciting and tiring at the same time.
- You write about the losses that you suffered one after another: in one month in 2009, mom and uncle Teddy died, then dad in 2011, and in the same year there was a break with her husband.
— Yes, all this made me give up. I describe this period as "pickling in grief."
“How did you survive this?”
— I have four children. I want them to see in me someone who can survive anything, because they will have to do this throughout their lives.
- Is it important to talk about your pain?
— Мы — a nation that cannot survive grief. The ability to listen to others and share our own suffering helps us to feel understood. I want to pay more attention to this, so I organized my own non-profit organization.
“I saw how you became an even more attentive friend over the past few years.” You regularly find out from me how I am doing.
— I was dependent on my mother, so after her death I had to talk more with friends and say something like: “Can I come for lunch?”
- What does it mean to you to be happy?
— I call this state yuhu moments. I can feel them inside. True, now they have become different - they appear quietly. As we get older, it is important to appreciate smaller things: my children come to dinner, someone invites me somewhere, a person tells me that I helped him. This is not Disneyland. This is when a friend calls to say hi, and I understand how much we mean to each other.
Опра: Maria, I'm with you. Yuhu!
