Personal experience: what life has taught me in two countries
'07.05.2022'
Source: CNS
The situation of suspension developed in the year when I entered the university. My scientific parents immigrated to the United States back in the dashing 1990s. And I, as luck would have it, from the fifth grade dreamed of trying to enter the journalism faculty of Moscow State University, so after graduating from an American school, my mother honestly bought two tickets New York - Moscow, and we flew, Masha Gorban says especially for CNS.
I didn't have university tutors, and neither did I have time and cronyism. In the next entrance of our house lived a director, a graduate of VGIK, she undertook to tell me in a month and a half about what teachers usually expect from applicants for humanitarian universities. These were amazing lessons, I still remember her stories about the ghost of Gogol's boots and the white queens of Venechka Erofeev.
Then everything was fast and nervous, my mother woke up already in the building of the Moscow State University dormitory, not far from the image of three sausages on the wall in the corridor. Under the sausages was written "Oops-punk!" Mom got scared and tried to flee, but her sixteen-year-old daughter (that is, I) was obscenely happy looking at the mattresses eaten by mice and the corners stained with cockroaches. I became a student of journalism.
Since then, flights have begun - at least twice a year to the United States and back. With things and books. Many times I tried to latch onto one place and chain myself to it - I entered an American graduate school, bought a car and tubs of flowers, got a job in Russia without travel opportunities to the United States, but I could not choose.
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Living in two countries is expensive
Being unmarried and childless, I could easily buy a ticket the day before departure and impromptu to descend to my family - for a long weekend, for a vacation, for a vacation, during a creative crisis or on a business trip.
But then I got married. She gave birth to a daughter, a little later - a son. At some point, tickets to Houston and back began to cost us as much as two months of rest in Greece. At the same time, the children wanted to see their grandparents, I hung out on maternity leave, and I really didn’t want to save money on family ties.
With the growth of the dollar, the financial situation worsened: it became more and more difficult to exist in the States for two average Moscow salaries. At some point, my husband, an electronics engineer, took a six-month leave from his Moscow job at his own expense and began studying English in Texas (he had German at school). At the same time, I got a job at the first job I came across, where good English and qualifications were not required. Needless to say, the salary of an unskilled worker in Texas in those six months was higher than the salary of a Moscow engineer.
Living in two countries is fun
I will not lie: in such a life is full of advantages, for the sake of them we are all up to it. So, we have always maintained excellent relations with our parents, we are a real clan.
Our children are bilingual. They are sensitive and interesting languages. A daughter, for example, in kindergarten was confident that the word “food” in English sounds like “snow” (snack). The son is still confident that the ladybug (ladybug) speaks quietly to those around the "muuuu."
We always have enough sun and vitamin D, since every year we run away from winter and colds into summer. We have the ability to compare medicine, working conditions and the sense of humor of others. We also have credit cards that are accepted all over the world and all over the Internet.
We learned how to pack a suitcase for four (and six months) in one evening. Carry two strollers, a bicycle and car seats with you without paying a dime to the airlines. Quietly leave the apartments in the care of friends. Argue with Russian officials about the normality of a US birth certificate with apostille and consular translation. Argue with customs officials about the same thing. To arrange children in sections for six months and three months. Find the best, interesting, important and optimal everywhere - after all, we will leave soon, so we need to do as much as possible! Maintain communication at a distance. Don't get attached to things. Live by one day.
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To live in two countries nervously
The other day I had to go through a security check at my place of work. It was required to indicate all the addresses of my residence for the last seven years. Wow, I ruffled the nerves of the specialists in this very security, because the addresses changed 2-4 times a year: one half in the USA, the other in Russia.
I have always been unpretentious, enduring, optimistic and adventurous, but at some point I caught myself thinking that I have no feeling at home. That is all. And in 33, I really want it to be. Where to get?
At the current stage of international relations, it is difficult to be the one who combines Russian and American cultures. There is always a person with an in-depth knowledge of history (for example, who believes that the United States won World War II, or who is sure that all Russian internal problems are painstakingly created by the Americans) who will make your day unforgettable. You have to be tolerant. Or cynical.
It’s impossible to live in two countries
Even such a stubborn being, as I finally accepted this fact. I can not say that after 17 years of constant flights, I am tired of nomadic life. I am ready to continue - just not to lose friends, connections, the smell of favorite childhood places, the feeling that this is where you are needed and expensive.
But looking at her husband and children realized that they were tired. They want home. Stability Coziness I want all things to be stored in the same house, and not “it seems these photos remain in the Moscow computer” and “oh, we did not take these documents this time”.
No matter how you love life in two countries, sooner or later you will have to part with it. Get ready!
