Actress of the 80s Lyudmila Nilskaya, known for the films “Through thorns to the stars”, “State border”, “Midshipmen, forward!”, “Where is the nofelet?” and the modern TV series "Galina", where she played the role of Galina Brezhneva, told about her difficult fate, nine-year immigration and returning home.
“I started from scratch twice. The first time when I ended up in America with my husband and little son. I didn't want to go, I thought for a long time before making this decision. When my mother found out about our plans, she had a heart attack, - quotes Lyudmila 7 Days... - Thank God, everything worked out. I told my husband: "Well, why am I going, what will I do there?" These were the 90s. Nilskaya was no longer invited to film, although by that time she was already a well-known actress - she worked at the Mayakovsky Theater, played the main roles in the films "Grasshopper", "State Border", "Petrovka 38", "Mad Money".
Simply, the cinema in our country at that time “ended” - the studios of the studios surrendered to commercial structures as warehouses. Yes, and people in theaters stopped going, many were on the verge of poverty. “And I went, because I understood: as an actress, I have nothing to do here, and I don’t know anything else ... We made out the documents for a very long time. I remember at the interview at the embassy I even told the story of my expulsion from the Moscow Art Theater School for twos in the history of the party and scientific communism.
I attributed to myself a little bit of “dissidence”, although in fact I got “unsuccessful” only because of my own carelessness ... In 1994, we finally got permission to leave.
Of course, our departure cannot be compared with the emigration of 70's. At that time, the country was behind the “iron curtain” and anyone who left their homeland was considered almost a traitor. But we, too, were leaving forever - we renounced citizenship, we handed over Russian passports, sold housing ... ”. Lyudmila did not cherish illusions about possible work in Hollywood, she understood that she would have to part with the acting profession. But she hoped that she would find a new business for herself in America, hoping that her husband would be able to unwind. “Although if I had turned on my brains, I would have asked myself an elementary question: since his whole life didn’t work, why should it have happened in America? Zhora has neither a profession nor education. In Moscow, he worked as an administrator at the Mayakovsky Theater, where I arranged for him. ” In general, in America, everything was not the way it seemed from Moscow.
“Jorin's father called us to the States, but of course,“ a country of great opportunities. ” But my father-in-law was already retired, so for people of his age there are really no problems there. If I had gone to America beforehand and looked at how “our” people live there, I would never have gone. Each by itself, no communication. For 9 years I have not had a single friend. And it is financially very fragile, because the whole country lives on credit - for cars, apartments, houses, you must constantly pay interest. I could not get used to the endless number of envelopes that fell on me when I opened the mailbox, and it was only bills, bills, bills ... And if you have a job, you can pay for them, and if not, you instantly lose all . All these years, I felt like a hot skillet.
But the husband said: “I can! Open your business, and everything will work out. " And I believed. By stupidity. Lyudmila and her husband settled in the state of Colorado, rented a house. George opened a car repair shop. On what the most part of money from sale of the Moscow two-room apartment went.
Lucy sat at home with a small child and ... missed Moscow, mother, theater. “Mom could only visit us once — an expensive trip somewhere. She was delighted. In the supermarket, with its abundance, she walked like in a museum: “Lord, is it really possible?”. In the Union, then little was sold, and she, of course, enjoyed it very much. And to me, these American delicacies across the throat got up and seemed terribly tasteless. Greedily caught any news from home. When something began to revive in Russia - they started making films, putting on interesting performances, it really hurt me.
I really wanted to go back. But how? Where? It seemed that all the bridges were burned. Therefore, trying to somehow adapt to the new life. When her son grew up a bit, she graduated from computer courses. But she never got a job. Well, it is impossible for me to sit all day in the office and stupidly press the keys. Then she went to the shop selling clothes, and I didn’t like it there either. From customers hiding in the dressing room. For some time I worked part-time, serving our Russian grandmothers — I drove them in my car to the store, to the hairdresser, to see a doctor. There were very intelligent old women. They seemed embarrassed by the fact that I, a well-known, in general, artist, serve them, so they tried to somehow alleviate this situation - they told me, for example: “Don't work, dear. I will take this bag myself. ” But there was one mischievous granny who just mocked me. For example, I had to take her to the hospital in the middle of the night, because the thermometer showed her 37 temperature. At some point I just sent her. She then called me, asked me to come back. “No,” I say, “I will never return to you.” In short, it was not life, but some kind of dreary existence. The money received from the sale of the apartment quickly ran out - we just simply spent it. Georgy's car service has gone bankrupt. ” But Ludmila's husband began to fly to Moscow, gradually his trips became more and more frequent and long. He explained them by the fact that in Moscow there was finally an opportunity to make money. In fact, another woman appeared in his life. “At that time we were already living in Boston with Jorina’s sister.
She gave us a basement in her house and, as is customary in America, charged us money for living. Well, God is her judge, as they say. I never had a close relationship with my husband's relatives, and then he began to leave all the time. I understood: something is unclean here.
I felt abandoned, no one with my child needed. It was very hard. I imagined the future, and it became just scary to me. In the States, after all, children break away from their homes very early - in 17 years, everyone already lives independently. And Dimka gradually became a real American. Although we spoke Russian in the family, the son has already begun to confuse Russian and English words. “Well, with whom is there,” I thought, “will I stay?”. One, without friends, without relatives ... A longing mortal. Therefore, when Zhora once again returned from Moscow and said:
“We are getting a divorce, because I met a woman ...”, “I’m straight - oooh!” - as if the stone had fallen off the shoulders. Honestly, breathing immediately became easier. I realized that at last something in my life will change. And I still thank God for the fact that this happened, otherwise it would have rotted in this vaunted America. ”
But the separation from her ex-husband was not easy for Lyudmila. Still, in marriage, they lived 20 years. “Zhora was brought to the theater by my friend, with whom they served in the army. And Zhora fell in love. As a devoted dog, I was ready to be around all the time. Do not take my admiring eyes. He presented bouquets, made gifts. And, as they say, sat out his. I was not embarrassed that Zhora was more than four years younger. I thought that no one in life would love me any more, hoping that Zhorina would have enough love for both of us. I just got used to him - at some point he became a real person, ready for me for everything. And indeed, his love for me lasted a long time - probably 15 years.
I treated Zhora well, only I did not like him. He knew this — I could never hide my lack of feelings. In 83, we signed. The wedding was “theatrical” - everyone from the registry office went to a restaurant, and I went to play a performance. After joined the festive feast.
At first, Lyudmila and her husband lived in an actor’s hostel until the theater helped to get an apartment - first one-room, then two-room. They really wanted a child, but the son was born only 8 years after the wedding. “I haven't had a chance to give birth. And the doctors could not understand anything - everything seems to be fine, but the child could not bear it.
At six months - a miscarriage, at five - the same story. And imagine what experiences, how much physical pain I experienced every time! If it were not for Zhorin’s support, I might have given up my desire to become a mother, but my husband insisted. I went through a lot of research at the Institute of Mother and Child, and there, finally, they found out what caused this nightmare. Prescribed the appropriate treatment. I gave birth to a son only on the fourth attempt. Dima is probably the only thing for which I am truly grateful to my husband. Otherwise, he turned out to be a completely worthless person - zero, zero. When we parted, even the plane ticket did not want me to buy. “Dima,” he said, “I will buy, but you won't.” But still bought. In Moscow, the former spouses flew in the same plane, but at the airport they simply went their separate ways.
But friends there already met Lucy.
“I was scared to leave for America, but it was even worse to return to Moscow. I flew in with my twelve-year-old son, two suitcases of clothes and 300 dollars in my wallet. She never even dreamed of starting working again in the cinema or in the theater. I thought that in the 9 years of absence I had already been forgotten in my homeland. Yes, and age again. But a friend persuaded.
She is a film producer, and when I was still in America, my calls to the handset “well, what am I going to do there ?!” suggested: “Slap” will you go to work with me? ”. And I said, "I'm going." “The Flapper” is a man who announces on camera to the camera: “Frame such and such, double of this and that,” slams a special tablet and keeps records of the footage.
In short, I flew to Moscow, relying only on this work, but then I didn’t care if I was at home. When I called old friends and said that I had returned forever, basically everyone was glad to see me. Although, I know, behind my back some were surprised, they say, why did she come here? I would sit in my America and not cough. ”
At first, Lyudmila and her son lived with a friend. Friends helped to quickly make a Russian passport. She didn’t have a chance to work as a “clapper” - in a month she had already gone on stage. “I urgently needed an actress in an entrepreneurial performance, and my fellow student, who also played there, advised:“ Take the Nile. She is in Moscow and, in my opinion, in great shape. ” There was no time at the rehearsal - they just told me what and how I should do, colleagues from behind the scenes suggested the text.
I was terribly worried, but I understood that it was like an exam for professionalism. I survived it. Thanks to this work, I had money, and soon I was able to rent an apartment. A couple of years ago I bought my own housing. Let a small studio apartment and far from the center, but my, or rather, our son and me. Now in the house is a major overhaul. Hope to end soon. I do not count on the help of my ex-husband. What kind of alimony, if I can not even determine the place of his work. In his 46 years Zhora never found himself. I don’t know what he does, but I think he doesn’t have big money. Yes, and I do not need any money from him. I can handle everything myself. ”