The article has been automatically translated into English by Google Translate from Russian and has not been edited.

How to make a good first impression on Americans

'03.07.2021'

Source: School of Life

It is no secret to anyone that for successful communication you need to be polite, share a mutual desire for conversation, know the customs and rules of good manners of the country with a representative of which you have to communicate, and also be able to choose the right topic for conversation. But funny things happen even in the world of diplomacy.

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Once a diplomat from Russia politely asked his Swedish colleague about the health of his wife, since she had just given birth, writes Natalia Valenti for Schools of Life... Dry gratitude sounded in response. The diplomat further inquired about who was born - a boy or a girl. The Swedish gentleman jumped up and sharply answered that when the child grows up, he will decide for himself whether he is a boy or a girl.

Since gender issues confuse Western politicians, even conversations on such topics lead to general confusion and complete absurdity. In the United States, such a formulation of the question is basically impossible, so you can safely be interested in the sex of a newborn child. But first we will discuss the general rules of the first acquaintance.

Statistics say that we can determine the success of our 15-minute conversation within the first three minutes with a probability of 96%. We will no longer have a second chance to make a first impression. In communication, as in any art, we have a master and a set of tools. It is you! We cannot change many things in ourselves, but our voice, smile, manners, gestures, body positioning, choice of clothing style is our reasonable choice. And it is to them that the first attention of worthy interlocutors is paid. If you are judged by those parameters that you are unable to change (height, weight, race), then most likely these people are not worth your time.

How to look

Many Russian women prefer to dress catchy, somewhat defiant and very sexy. Thus, they knowingly transfer attention from their personality to their body. Be sure to inquire about what style to dress in so you don't look out of place. Dress-code was not invented by chance. Let you be remembered as an elegantly dressed woman, and not "that one with such legs and such a bust." To be honest, this is the lot of many girls from third world countries. Don't let your figure overshadow your personality. The ability to arouse respect for yourself, and not the primitive reaction of an animal, speaks only of your development.

It is advisable to have on yourself something unusual, such as an antique ring or a purse. In English, there is the concept of conversation piece. What does it mean? For example, a metal chain from old times, from the distant Arkhangelsk province, inherited by me, attracts constant attention, although it costs nothing at modern prices. Thanks to her, I made interesting acquaintances who took the chain as an excuse to strike up a conversation with me.

Of course, clothes should not be depressingly neutral, they should be expressive and correspond to the image that you create in society. Who will take seriously a woman dressed as a teenager? Or a guy in headdresses and chains? A classic style that emphasizes your figure, is a win-win option in any society.

How to move

You probably know what personal space means. It is an invisible physical boundary that should not be crossed. In the United States, it is arm's length. Shaking hands is the standard of greeting between a man and a woman at a formal meeting. Russian men gallantly kissing the hand of an unknown American woman risk causing her serious displeasure. Emphasizing gender differences is considered outdated, or even worse, sexism. You can argue with this, but only on your own territory. Polite treatment in the United States must be asexual.

If you come across a person who rushes to embrace you, do not pull back or cringe. Forgive others their habits, even if they seem strange to you.

How to say

By the reaction of those around you, you will know that you are speaking too softly or too loudly. Try not to strain the listener, otherwise the conversation with you will be a burden for him. Emphasis is a sufficient barrier to easy communication. If you decide to apologize for your pronunciation, you will most likely run into a compliment, since you will not find more grateful listeners than Americans. They really love the Russian accent. However, you should express yourself as clearly and clearly as possible so that you are perceived as an equal interlocutor.

How to start a conversation

So, any conversation begins a few minutes before the pronunciation of the first words. Your energy, appearance, gait already set up a stranger to you to a certain tone. Carry yourself with confidence, look in the face, do not hide your eyes, radiate goodwill and respect. Smile, but do not bare your teeth.

At the first meeting, be very kind, contact by name and rank (Dr. Smith, Mr. Greenwood, Miss Rosenbloom or Mrs. Weber). Wait until you are invited to switch to less formal treatment, especially if you are introduced to an older person. It is much more natural to switch to familiarity from a more respectful tone than vice versa (for example, it would be strange after Hey, Jennifer, how is it going? To return to Good evening, Mrs. Weber).

Again, pay attention to the physical distance between the participants in the conversation. As a rule, Russians allow a closer distance than Americans, thereby causing some discomfort to the interlocutor. When interacting with a child or person in a wheelchair, lower yourself to eye level. Make sure that you do not speak louder or quieter than others, do not interrupt, do not contradict, if only there is a mistake in the pronunciation of your name. A good start is half the battle!

The rule of first meeting: be beautiful if you can, witty if you want, but friendly - anyway!

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