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How to set life goals in order to achieve anything

Sergey Evelev

writer, TV and radio host


There are such people. They know how to set goals and fulfill their plan. And they are few.

Фото: Depositphotos

I'm not talking about school and the 10-12 years spent in it in order to obtain a certificate and - in a good variant - some knowledge, most of which will never be needed in life anyway. And I'm not talking about the university either, although this is closer to setting a goal and achieving it.

Here, more important factors are included. The opportunity to finally escape from the house where you were loved to death and where you had to live in a cage for 18 years by someone else's rules. For this, however, you were fed, clothed, tolerated all your antics, which are just a struggle with the pain of growing up. Do you want to be free for three / five years? Learn. If you give it up, you will have to return home or find a job, heal separately and suddenly find out that money does not grow on trees, socks themselves do not wash off, and you still need to get up and cook the omelet first, and then eat it: standing, sitting or even lying down ...

These are not the same goals. I’m more and more about those who themselves came to mind, no one pushed you to them. You yourself invented them, found the relevant arguments and facts. I talked to myself, asked questions, got answers, studied the subject, made a decision, saw the goal in the distance, developed a plan of action, cutting the “huge pizza” into small digestible pieces, and set about implementing the plan. That's what I'm talking about. And few can do it.

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The difficulties on this glorious and heroic path (I’m not joking) begin with the fact that many of us have completely incomprehensible goals set by us or by someone, even for us or for us. For example, the goal is money. That is, to get rich. Where is the catch? In the very formulation of the question. Money is not an end, but only a means to an end. The goal can be financial freedom in general, or, alternatively, freedom from parents. This is an opportunity to buy your own home or donate a million a year to charity. These are the goals.

Or, say, the goal is to write a book. Again, this is a remedy. The goals can be: the desire to become famous, to make sure that you are noticed, appreciated. Is becoming a doctor a goal? No again. The goal is to get a prestigious (in some countries) profession, perhaps to prove to your father (or someone else), who periodically reminded you for the first 20 years, that you are an insignificant-loser-mug and you will not achieve anything in life that you can, and that a nonentity-loser and a mug is just him, not you.

Therefore, it is important to separate the flies from the cutlets, without which further progress will be difficult. A person who has set himself a huge, elusive goal (doctor, lawyer, military pilot, scout, bank owner, virtuoso flutist, and so on) immediately enters the battlefield, where he is most often alone, and the opponents are the army.

I will explain. Having set such a difficult goal, you immediately oppose yourself to the majority, which goes with the flow. He lives, works, makes ends meet and complains that they were not given a chance to prove what they are capable of, or that the Masons took all the money and they got nothing. Often in this majority your relatives, friends and acquaintances. Oddly enough, many of them intuitively sense danger, trouble, trouble in your call. And they feel right. Everyone who has gone through a difficult path of struggle and hardship, but climbed to the top, becomes a living rebuke to all those who did not do this, did not dare, did not intend, did not bridle.

Therefore, the more ours there, on the plain, the greater resistance those who try to climb the mountain will encounter, no matter which, and no matter why. Simply: "Do not go, you can fall." And this, by the way, is true. You can. Moreover, most likely, you will fall down more than once or twice. And the winners are not those who fall less often, but those who know that they will fall, but learned to quickly get up and continue moving.

So what am I talking about? Most likely, it means that goal setting is an important, but not the most difficult part of the task. It is much more difficult to reach it, to find the strength to get up after each fall. It is important to learn not to listen and not to hear all those who are trying to "save" you, fearing that you will crash and fall. In fact, they are afraid (although this is a deeply subconscious process) of something completely different. They are afraid of your victory, as I have already said.

And if you understand this, then you have no right to stop. You go to your goal. Nobody will go there instead of you and will not get there. By doing this, you will conquer yourself (laziness, fear, insecurity, inability), and prove to everyone (if you need it) that you can, that you are worth, that you are the highest achievement of nature, a person, and that says it all.

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Only we humans are awarded this ability: to set ourselves seemingly impossible tasks and put years and effort into their implementation. But there is no feeling stronger than the feeling of completeness of this segment of the path. There is no more amazing picture than the one that opens up the mountain, especially when he sees thousands of others crowding downstairs with a demand not to take risks, immediately go downstairs and join the crowd to absorb a collective dinner.

Set goals for yourself. Important. Huge. Impossible. Develop a plan of action and - most importantly - take action. Don't look at anyone. Don't compare yourself to anyone. Praise yourself for progress, even the smallest. Do not scold yourself if you are stuck in a ditch. Everyone gets stuck. Get out. Everything will grow together. Everything will work out. I'm sure. One hundred percent. And I have no doubts on this topic. Just like that - no, that's all!

If you want to talk with me about it - go to my page in Facebook.

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