How to respond to harassment to protect yourself
'28.10.2018'
Source: with the BBC
Harassment in many forms, from unambiguous chasing remarks to assaults with the intent of rape, is a real life problem. How to protect yourself?
According to data published in the new report, the harassment of women and girls is so firmly entrenched in our culture that we do not notice them even when they occur in plain sight, writes Air force. And the aggressor is always to blame for this, not the woman who allegedly should change her behavior, and then no one will cling to her.
But what about those who have become the object of unsolicited attention or harassment?
Hollaback International Movement Against Harassment! recognizes that there is no right or wrong reaction in such a situation, but there are several useful behavioral tactics.
Be tough
Hollaback organizations usually recommend not to enter into a conversation with the aggressors, as this may worsen the situation.
But if you think it's appropriate, look into the eyes of the one who is harassing you, and sharply condemn his behavior in a loud and clear voice. You can say, “I don’t like it” or “Stop saying that.”
The Bristol group Zero Tolerance, which created the manual for responding to street claims, offers to respond calmly, balancedly and without offense.
Saying something like “Don't whistle” or “Don't touch me” will make it clear that you don't like this behavior, the group advises. If you respond in a “calm but confident tone”, you will be better able to convey the necessary information, the signal “have respect”.
The group also advises:
- ask: "What do you think gives you the right to put your hand on my leg?"
- loudly inform passersby about what the aggressor said or did;
- Ask the aggressor if he would like someone to do this to his beloved.
Examples of protective reactions are also divided by users of social networks.
One Twitter user wrote that her daughters (12 and 15 years old) are “constantly being devoured by their eyes,” and gave an example of how she forced the eyes of a person who was looking at their bodies with her gaze.
Get out of the situation
Harassment can take many forms, from “smile, baby” on the street to attempting to touch women by their private parts or assault with the aim of rape.
In such situations, the most important thing is to leave as quickly as possible.
“Not all harassment develops into something more serious, but anything is possible, so your first priority should be your own safety,” advises Molly Akgerst of Hollaback London.
Rachel Nicholas from the Victim Support charity that assists victims of crime, including harassment, agrees with this: if you feel in danger, try to go to a safe place.
If you are traveling by public transport, you can get off at the next stop or get closer to the driver. And if you are close to home, you can go to the neighbors so that the pursuer does not know exactly where you live, she adds.
What can an outsider do?
According to Charlotte Gage of Bristol Zero Tolerance, outside intervention can be beneficial. You can also ask the person you are clinging to: "Are you in trouble?"
“It will be a manifestation of solidarity, support. Thus, you will inform: “I am near, you are not here alone,” says Gage.
Akgerst advises referring to the victim rather than the persecutor to avoid escalating the conflict. “Ignoring the abuser will make him feel powerless and also let him know that he is being watched,” she says.
Akgerst advises to look into the victim's eyes of harassment and intervene, standing between her and the aggressor. To do this, you can pretend that you are personally acquainted with the victim.
How to declare harassment
“All cases of harassment that caused you fear for your own safety at some point or later should be reported,” says Nicholas.
According to her, if you are molested or forced to do something, you have every right to report this to the police.
“People often fear that such cases will not be taken seriously. But that shouldn't stop you, ”says Nicholas. If at this moment you are in danger, call the police immediately.
Recall that the other day, journalists managed to gain access to the office of Harvey Weinstein, a scandalous Hollywood producer, from whose name a large-scale wave of revelations about harassment began at different times, which grew into the #MeToo movement. In the office, there is still the same sofa that all American movie stars were terrified of. Read more in our material.
