How to learn to speak so that you are truly heard
'05.02.2020'
By a certain age, we already know how to communicate. We pronounce the words, put them into sentences. We place punctuation marks, correctly or not. In any case, we comprehend the science of speaking. But the words of some do not mean anything, others simply solve short-term tasks, and still others turn the world, start wars, and save peoples.
And I thought, why so? The words of both of them are not very different, and their connection seems to be ... Well, some speak louder and others are quieter. Someone pronounces faster, someone slower. But what a difference! What is the reason, in the end?
Honestly, I was busy with this dilemma for a long time. I found some explanations, delved into them, disassembled into the smallest bricks, seemed to get to the bottom of the matter and ... again rejected the decision. It came suddenly itself (an amazing property of the brain or some other part of our being). Those whose words are effective, significant, cause a violent reaction of the crowd, forcing them to follow - these are people who speak their words. Yes, yes, I know this is a concept that needs clarification. It would seem that everyone says their words. But no! Not so. We say words taken from mom, lent to a teacher, those that we learned from a book, TV, computer game. They are strangers and, repeated by us, are worthless, since they mean nothing.
I give an example. Unappetizing. If a person took it and carefully (which almost no one does) chewed food and then, instead of swallowing the resulting slurry, transferred it to another person, then he would not receive any pleasure from what he put in his mouth. There is already no taste, no special smell. There is no idea what kind of food it was. The brain is not able to present it in its original form and, as a result, send the necessary signals, use the corresponding taste buds ... The product is the same, but the reaction / result is completely different.
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So, so that simple words suddenly turn into something significant, say, the speech of Dr. Martin Luther King or President Kennedy, who promised the whole world that the American astronaut will soon set foot on the moon, pronouncing them must be said to HOLY BELIEVE. I highlighted the words not by chance, but because it is very important. The speaker must fall ill with these words, thoughts, concepts. It should become part of his being, life, existence. She must not let him fall asleep at night, taunt him, excite, disturb constantly.
I do not mean people like Mavrodi, the creator of MMM, or Meidof, who has collected millions by deceiving people. Their words, too, were quite convincing, but they are high-flight crooks who portrayed confidence in their ideas.
So, the effectiveness of words lies in their chargedness with inner fire, meaning, experiences accumulated on this topic, which pour into painful, and not “overflow from empty to empty”. Hence the question: can any person learn to speak so that his words are always effective? The answer is no. I think it can’t. And it’s not at all because he is bad, bad, lazy or badly speaking. But because all topics, all ideas, all concepts cannot be equally close to his heart. And only what is said by the heart reaches the heart. In other cases, you yourself know where these words go ...
You noticed that sometimes, visiting a performance (of any direction), we say that something was missing there. It seems that they played well and danced well, but still there was something missing. I will say what was not: there was no heart. Sent by brains, calculation, sleight of hand, special effects, most likely, will be the head and accepted. And although it can be a stunning success, but ... at the head. An attempt to accept with the heart what was sent by the head, as a rule, is doomed to failure. The other way is the same story. Trying to accept with your head what was sent by the heart does not work for the same reason.
So, we summarize.
The effectiveness of speech depends on how much the speaker believes in what he said.
He can brilliantly memorize the whole text, but, most likely, no one is moved or cried. Fictitious faith, a fake mask - are visible, palpable immediately and by everyone, no matter how poor the poor guy on the catwalk tries. There are, of course, exceptions, but there are very few, very, very few. Basically, the one who lies is the one who lies. Hitler spoke with his heart. He firmly believed that he could offer the world one higher race. And no matter how absurd this idea was, it cost humanity that followed it more than a dozen million lives. Perhaps Marx and Engels, and even Lenin once, also sacredly believed. Although here I am one hundred percent not sure.
The violin often resonates in the heart (if the master plays) because it plays with the heart, and only with the heart can one perceive it. There are not even words there, so as not to be distracted by them.
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Learn to talk. And, more importantly (if you need to give a speech and you want it to be successful, to lead to a result) fall in love with the idea. Live your performance inside. Feel everything you want to say. Let the stomach swell with excitement. Let sweat break through from everywhere. Let it be scary that they do not understand, do not appreciate. We do what we can, and then what happens.
May this become your credo, your mantra. And if the speech did not produce the desired / desired action, then it was not the words that let you down, and you were not able to put the main thing in them: faith in what you say (I did not say that you do not believe it, I said that to invest failed). It did not work out to saturate them with an unshakable obsession, to fill them with life, to blow up their brain for them to begin with. Dead words do not revive the dead. Alive - wake the living alive.
So, it seems to me, everything is simple. And there is no white or black magic here. No grams and not a bit.
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