The game of rebuses: how to answer the main life questions
'13.01.2020'
Life asks us questions. Every day, every minute. And it gives everyone the opportunity to answer them. Illness is the question. How will you react? Endure, telling everyone how bad you are, demanding attention, being capricious like a child, forcing others to feel sorry for you, sacrificing their time, babysitting you, giving in in everything? Or will you grit your teeth and walk on hot coals like a hero?
Death is also a question. How do you experience her, a stranger, naturally? Putting up, blaming everyone, people and heaven? By the way, you can also blame yourself. This is a comfortable position, especially for those who want to play the victim. Works like a clock. And sometimes, it is really difficult not to blame yourself if it seems that you overlooked, did not arrive on time, did not follow. But it's still a question. And any answer is correct. Both cowardly and heroic. Everyone chooses his own and lives according to the given answer. True, life also does not sleep and will certainly throw you many more puzzles to solve, however, giving you the right to replay the game from the beginning every time and, possibly, consider another, new scenario for its ending.
Our behavior is based on whether we consider ourselves a set of thoughts / rules / postulates / habits that to some extent control our lives. And if we don’t like the results of the game we played (the decision we made or the chosen line of behavior), then you can always try to change something. But it’s difficult, and in general ... laziness. Therefore, the rake always works in the same mode, hitting us on the head, although we approach them from different sides.
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The child is the question. How we will raise it and what to think and do at the same time - these are our answers to it. All children, as well as parents, are different. Therefore, the answers are not at all similar. As a result, the entire “happy childhood” is spread (like honey on bread) all over the earth, unevenly. Somewhere dense, but somewhere empty. Someone grows up a genius, someone a murderer. The next set of questions: who is to blame for what happened (I'm talking about children)?
The answers to these questions determine the state in which, having understood whom they raised, parents will go further in life. Will they go crazy, sit on antidepressants, jump from the bridge (if the child became a drug addict or became seriously ill with something) or, clenching their teeth, will pass the crawling test.
And so it is always and in everything. It does not matter whether we are talking about an attempt to take a person out of a burning house, risking his life, or to report suspicions that a neighbor's child (who was born and raised in front of your eyes) is plotting something bad. You can donate your parachute on an airplane to a pregnant woman, give up your seat in a boat to a couple in love, give your last money to a beggar, let a homeless stay overnight, and do many other strange and even crazy things while answering life's questions. And, in fact, there are not so many of them. Who are you? What are you? Why here? What is it capable of? What are you ready for? What you can sacrifice if need be. How do you assess others in general and in each specific situation in particular. Who are they? Cannon fodder? Brothers in misfortune? Birds in a cage not knowing about it? Pawns in someone else's game? Tools to achieve your goals? Who!
Waking up every morning, we have no idea what kind of trick she, the hostess life, will throw out today. And that's why none of us is ready to answer the questions that have not yet been asked. And no matter how we train, no matter how many clever books we read and educational lectures we listen to, every question, every exam is final. This is no longer a rehearsal, but a premiere. The question has been asked, and it is not easy to choose one answer from the mass of existing ones or even suggested by someone. Everything depends on him: your present day, and all subsequent life, as well as the lives and destinies of other people, whom you may know or not.
As in Bradbury (the story "And Thunder Rocked"): you step on a butterfly in one place - and in a thousand years it will turn out that life has gone completely in the wrong direction. And if it's not a butterfly, but if you stepped on purpose, and if you don't wait a thousand years?
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Let's treat every question / task that life throws at our feet responsibly, seriously, thoughtfully. And if there is such an opportunity (although sometimes it really is not), let's take a break. Let's brainstorm, play in our minds, like chess players, every move - and choose the one that seems to us advantageous in this situation.
We are not gods and we cannot foresee everything. But the main thing here is to be honest with yourself. It is important to know that you tried and did the best you could. And no matter what happens later, you do not blame yourself, do not scold yourself, do not walk your whole life with a crown of thorns of guilt, thinking that someone put it on you (the crown, that is). You put it on yourself. If you want - wear, bleeding. If you want, take it off. If you want, don't wear it at all. All three options are on your menu.
Decide. Choose. Take action. Do not be afraid. Do not despair. And most importantly, do not regret anything.
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