On the final day of the New Wave contest, the singer decided to talk frankly about her breakup with her husband Dmitry Ivanov after 10 years of marriage.
Lolita shared with the correspondent of the portal Teleprogramma.pro Lika Bragin, who is not going through the best of times, but cannot be offended by her fourth spouse.
- I am not a strong woman, like everyone else, it hurts me painfully, and I do not know how to live on. I listen to many psychologists, there is a terrific Mikhail Labkovsky. I put his lectures at night and in the morning I wake up updated, seemingly brainwashed. And then a day passes, it all disappears, and I understand that no matter what wise advice you give, until you live your pain, nothing will go away.
- All your colleagues and friends support you very much, the same Angelika Varum wrote a very touching post ...
- I am happy that I have such friends. It’s already been half the battle. And the second half is for me - not to disappoint friends, not to remain in their memory some kind of aching, aging, fatty alcoholic - as they write on the Internet. Many thanks to everyone for their support!
- Abandoned and offended women behave differently. What kind of person are you?
- If you asked Dmitry Ivanov what I am, then here is the answer: at midnight, absolutely terrible SMS messages, for which it is very embarrassing in the morning. Then I apologize and say that I was upset. There are probably people who, after breaking up, smile beautifully at each other, remain good friends, but I have not seen such relationships of the former. Therefore, I commit barbaric stupidity and then I feel ashamed for it, but Dima treats this very wisely, he understands everything. I always said and say that, despite the fact that Dima is younger than 12 years old, he was always wiser than me. And the step he took is wise enough. I can not be offended by Dima, because he is right, in fact, this is his strength. He said that he was leaving me and that’s normal. Speak into the eyes what is true. And I will not stand and pretend to be a girl "from people like me, do not leave!". Yes, they leave from whatever! And here Dima is right. But I, even realizing that he was right, still write terrible night messages ...
- And you did not think to kill this pain with new love?
“No, my husband has not yet come out of my heart.” And then, I'm already an adult woman. If it were 30 years ago, I would immediately go in search to prove how cool I am. And I would have agreed with some tough guy, a bodybuilder, to introduce him to my man. But these are all manifestations of childhood. I believe that relations need to be fought, and if all else fails, then you need to give yourself time so as not to ruin the life of any normal person. Wedge does not kick out with a wedge ...
- Do you already have any grandiose plans and goals that help you move forward?
- No, I’m married for the fourth time, so I don’t set any goals for myself. But you know, when the other day I went to try on fashion designer Igor Gulyaev, he told me: “Do you know that you have decreased by 14 centimeters in the waist since a recital in Crocus ?!” The reason for my weight loss is understandable, as well as that make-up artists became much more popular with me, it became easier for them to paint me. There is one reason - divorce. My stress nervous system worked this way. Now I am trying to maintain this weight, although I have not yet reached the gym.
- Have you had any creative successes, new songs against the background of this emotional breakdown?
- All the songs that were shot recently, including the “Papa” that I sang here, were all acquired during my marriage, Dima was one of the first listeners. And so it turns out that it’s kind of like shooting a topic. Those who have not heard these songs before, say: “Well, she has confirmed the divorce!” I don’t write songs and poems, I don’t know how.
- How will you restore strength and nervous system?
- The first thing I will do as my free time appears is to go to a psychotherapist's doctor and ask for some sedative droppers and vitamins. Not only me, but many of my colleagues can not sleep without sleeping pills. And on the basis of any stress, everything intensifies, and I can not eat or sleep for days. So I’m going to surrender to the psychotherapist.
- How does your daughter support you?
- Eva, I’m a very wise girl, she supports me, reassures me, she says: “Mommy, maybe you need to talk to Dima again?” Although we try not to raise this topic in the family, this is an extra irritant.
“Why did you now reveal your soul to us like that?”
- Because Dima and I have no dirt in relations. But we both considered it below our dignity to take our situation to people, to go pouring our souls somewhere on talk shows. We gave each other time to think and did not accept a single commercial offer that we received. And there were a lot of them. And one more thing that pushed me to sincerity. Last year turned out to be very scary, many of my friends and acquaintances broke up ... Sometimes I don’t even cry because of myself, but because of friends, I think: “And this couple broke up, and this one. There are three children, two there ... ”There were practically no married couples around me, and a few more on the verge of a divorce. Therefore, I want to stop at least someone, so that people go together with psychologists, try to work on relationships. Dima and I did not work on relations either - this was our misfortune. We were not happy with some moments in each other, over 10 years a lot of things have accumulated. But we did not talk, ran away from problems. And it was necessary to go together to a psychologist and honestly talk about the personal in order to save the family. That is why I am so frank today.
- You seem to have said that Dima already has a new love ...
- No, I didn’t say anything like that, I don’t collect gossip. But there are “well-wishers”, mentally unhealthy girls who regularly write different dirt to me from different accounts: “Thank God that he left her. Dima must have a young wife to give birth to a child. " Dima didn’t mess himself up with anything, the reason for our divorce is not that a man younger than me went to a young girl. No, we both simply overworked, both set ourselves tasks and goals related only to work. And both laid everything on this altar. Dima squash, I'm on tour, and some important things started to leave the relationship. But we didn’t catch them by the tail, just to hug, to hold hands and say: “We will come up with something and fix it!” Dima made a wise decision to leave, which, by the way, put me in my place.
“Maybe you'll still be together?”
- I can’t speak for Dima, but he made the decision to leave me. And I can’t say whether we’ll be together again, this needs to be solved together. Maybe I’m not so happy with him anymore that he will say: “I don’t want to enter the same river twice”. And I will respect his every desire. So far I can only say one thing: my brains are busy with my, not yet ex, official husband!