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What is happiness and why childhood dreams do not come true

Sergey Evelev

writer, TV and radio host


There is a point of view that happiness is only in the realization of childhood dreams. The idea is interesting. Let's think about it together.

Photo: Shutterstock

What do we usually associate happiness with? With family, children, success in work, love, what else? With luck that came unexpectedly. A diagnosis that was not confirmed. A profitable investment. Created and sold by a company that brought in income enough to take long, or even never, take care of their daily bread. With a hobby that you dive into after a tiring day at work ... Probably, I did not take into account something, but the picture, I think, is more or less emerging.

On the other hand, there are those very infantile, childish and youthful dreams that rarely become reality. Here you need to divide the topic into two subtopics. The first is where the dreams come from and the second is why are they not realized?

So where do the dreams come from? This is important to understand, paying particular attention to what may be influencing them.

In the list: dad-mom, said by them, who they are by profession. The environment, of course. That which is heard from the radio TV and all the media involved. This is one direction. But there is something else, less logical and more fantastic. After all, there are known cases of the birth of a genius artist in the family of a shoemaker or composer at a tailor. There - there was no environment, no appropriate upbringing, and you go, look, where you turned out!

There are plenty of such examples in history. Dig only. Michelangelo's ancestors were bankers and civil servants. Chaliapin's parents are peasants, and Einstein's are entrepreneurs, businessmen, in today's language. And the question is: how is it? And here is another turn, which is an indirect confirmation of this theory. According to him, a person is born with a predestination: to be a hairdresser, a professor of ornithology, a violinist or a pilot. Otherwise, it cannot be explained, as, for example, with his parents - teachers of history - the boy was drawn to the sky from childhood. Others were not attracted. And the dad's pilot - the son does not always follow in the footsteps of his father. What does it mean? It means that it sits in each of us ... (you don’t want in everyone, let it be in many) whether it’s a gene, a predisposition, karma, whatever you call it, is what we came into this life for. And it is in childhood that the feeling of one's destiny is especially strong. You might even think that we come here with remnants of memory, where there is a "reminder" about why we are here. And then it is erased or shaded over time.

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And now, regarding the second part of the question: why does everything rarely work out?

Perhaps this memory, genetic or some other, is gradually being replaced by life. Ideas come from the outside. You are attacked, pushed into confectioners-programmers-ballerinas-builders. The mass of those “advancing” only grows over the years. They are supplemented by the opinions of relatives, and then friends, acquaintances. Well, TV and other media are gradually winning back pieces of your attention and trust in what they said and shown.

As a result, what was dreamed of is buried in deep snow and forgotten. And here, too, there are two options. Forgotten for a while or forever. In the first case, your dreams catch up with you and make you listen to them. And the engineer “suddenly” at forty-five begins to sing. Whether he remembers that he dreamed of becoming a singer as a child or not is not as important as the fact that he came to this. And the musician, sometimes, in the end realizes that he always wanted to repair cars, but somehow it was not with his hands. And then at fifty-five, having retired, he suddenly burst out. We know a lot of people (there are probably millions of them) who, on their life path, suddenly, it would seem, for no reason at all, made a sharp turn and went in a completely different direction. As a result, according to their own testimonies, these people have found happiness and are now doing what, perhaps, it was written for them. It is also true that there is no serious scientific evidence for this hypothesis. Only the experience of individual individuals, who were just "carried".

But, on the other hand, we are surrounded by millions of those who follow their path, “forgetting” about their dreams, go their whole life and do not take them anywhere. Are they happy? Some will say yes, some will say no. Where is the truth here, where is the lie (in which a person convinced himself, because living thinking every day about what did not work out is painful, painful for the psyche, even dangerous), we do not know. And therefore, until the level of happiness cannot be accurately measured, so we will wander in the dark. And the answer to the question whether real happiness is really possible only when your childhood dreams come true will remain in the gray zone. They will talk about this, even argue, but none of the disputing parties will prevail.

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Therefore, dear comrades parents! Pay attention to where "providence" (or whatever you want to call it) is taking your children. And think not only about what path-path you have outlined for your children, but also about what was planned for them before you. Where, when and by whom, I will not say exactly. But this is still no reason to dismiss their childish inclinations as whim, nonsense and stupidity. What if they are there? Do you want them to go wrong? Watch out for the kids. Watch closely and be vigilant. Where they are drawn, perhaps happiness is hidden. And they were destined to find him there. We are parents. Our task is to help them go where they want, and not where it seems to us to be correct, reasonable, logical and profitable. And in making the right decision regarding their life is our main parental task.

I think so.

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