The article has been automatically translated into English by Google Translate from Russian and has not been edited.

Opinion: what you need to know when marrying an American

'03.03.2022'

Source: GoRabbit

America is a country where dreams come true. This is a country of freedom, rich and generous men. So many of our girls think and dream about how the same American with his pockets full of dollars offers his hand and heart. And then - heaven happens on earth! Yes?

Photo: Shutterstock

What is really going on, tells the magazine GoRabbit immigration expert Yuri Mosha.

Culture and Traditions

It is believed that all Americans are terrible careerists. And indeed it is! Social status is very important for them, and it is most often possible to acquire it by systematically moving up the career ladder. In this regard, immediately hack into your nose: it may happen that you will not be in the first place with your American husband. He, of course, appreciates the family, but often sees in it a reliable rear, and all his aspirations are aimed at gaining public recognition and confirming his importance to society. Moreover, most often American men justify this by caring for the family, by the desire to create a reliable material base for their loved ones.

As a rule, Americans are adherents of quite traditional family values. A big house, kids, baseball trips, backyard barbecues and the indispensable Thanksgiving turkey are cute and gratifying things that pass from generation to generation to create an atmosphere of stability and peace.

However, there women have long won the war for their freedom, almost completely freed from domestic slavery. When they return from work, they do not start working the so-called second shift cleaning the house and preparing food for the week ahead. Housekeeping services and dinners in a restaurant in the US are quite common, if, of course, you can afford it. But even if not, then all the same, homework is not considered an unconditionally female duty, but is discussed and shared with a partner in a mode convenient for both.

Finance

Most Americans live in debt. For their own benefit, all sorts of corporations have made sure that this becomes a practically socially approved model. A student loan, a car loan, a mortgage for housing, credit cards - the entire financial model of the state is built in such a way that it is almost impossible to remain indebted to anyone.

But, despite the temptations, the American most often lives within his means, because he remembers that at the end of the month he will certainly have to pay the bills. And there is nothing worse than ruining your credit history. Not that this will make a person an outcast, but will significantly lower his standard of living. So it is imperative to ask your future husband about the annual income.

If you decide to enter the country as a bride, the groom will have to prove that he can support you at least the first time.

A man's annual income should be 125% of the so-called poverty line (similar to our living wage). In 2018, that was $20 for a family of two. If your child is traveling with you or the man has children from a previous marriage, then you need to add another $575 for each family member he supports.

Children

Americans love children and willingly create large families. However, it is worth remembering that their methods of education may not coincide with yours. Probably, some quite typical examples of the behavior of American children in our country would be considered licentiousness and pampered. For example, the opportunity to shout at parents or too expressive to demand satisfaction of some whims. And in response to a justified refusal or severe reprimand, there are threats to call the police.

Juvenile justice in the United States is more developed than at home. Schoolchildren in the classroom teach that no one has the right to hit them or raise their voices, including their parents. In general, this is the right practice. But, unfortunately, not everyone can negotiate and, accordingly, can teach this to their children. And those then transfer such destructive patterns of behavior to those around them. However, many Americans believe that this develops leadership qualities and allows children to better defend their interests in adulthood. Perhaps this is true.

If your future husband already has children from a previous marriage, then it is worthwhile to discuss in advance the policy of interaction with them. This topic is complex and delicate. And given your cultural differences and ignorance of some local realities, you need to be very careful in this matter. You should not try to become the second mother of the little ones - be neutral and keep a polite distance.

Divorce

Divorce in America is a long and troublesome business. On average, divorce proceedings take from one to three years. The case must be considered in court, and the longer it drags on, the more money you have to spend on lawyers.

Of course, if a prenuptial agreement was concluded before the wedding or the couple is childless and has no claims to each other, then everything can end faster. But more often than not, a divorce is accompanied by a clarification of relations and disputes about who the children will remain with, to whom the acquired property will go and what the amount of alimony should be. Sometimes, in order to avoid all these legal ordeals, spouses come to the decision to just live separately.

Therefore, if your elect asserts that he and his wife are in separation, then it is worth being alerted. Perhaps there was no official termination of their relationship, and then there could be no question of any marriage with you or immigration on the “visa of the bride”.

If your own family relationships end up in this way, then you can not worry about expulsion from the country.

As a rule, after a divorce, a woman has the right to continue to live in the United States, if no gross violations of the law have been noticed behind her. Children are likely to be left to the one who earns the most and can provide them with better living conditions. In this case, the other party will be obliged to pay child support.

I hope you find yourself a worthy man, and your marriage will be strong, happy and long!

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