20 secrets of happy female destiny from psychologist Mikhail Labkovsky
Happy fate directly depends on your own choice - actions, environment, self-esteem, the popular psychologist Mikhail Labkovsky is sure.
The expert told about what to do and what you should not do in any case, if you want to be a happy woman, for the portal GoRabbit.
1. Never need to communicate with married men. Fish trade in the fish store, meat - in the meat. Do not waste time. A married man does not need a wife, he already has one at home.
2. Nobody needs someone who I do not need myself. And you need someone who accepts himself as he is, lives a tasty, full-fledged life, despite all the possible everyday problems.
3. It's simple: he is - the way he is. And there you are - the way it is. You or good togetherOr you need to go away. And better before you took a mortgage and have three children.
4. If you are uncomfortable with a man on the first, second, third date, do not assign the fourth. In the first meetings, the man shows himself in the best possible way, and if it is already unpleasant for you to be with him, nothing good will come of this relationship.
5. The one who is mentally healthy is guided by his feelings and always chooses himself. Neither beauty nor love requires sacrifice. And if they do, it’s definitely not your story. Bring down. There is no such goal, for which there is something to endure in a relationship.
6. As for young, successful and beautiful women who cannot find a mate, because they, they say, have a high bar - this inability to relationship and fear of them.
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7. Need to to deal with the headand not with the suitors. When a woman says: “I loved” - this is often a story not about love. This is a story about a dragdiler who delivers necessary suffering to her. And healthy love is about how happy you are.
8. If you want to get married, you need to stop thinking about it. This is the same as the desire to have a doll on the hood, veil and the rest is shit. In healthy people, the situation looks a little different. First, they have the need to love. With this need to love, they find a man who loves them.
9. If you don't like the way he treats you, does something unpleasant, you tell him about it once. If it doesn't change, goodbye.
10. The most important verification of relationships: if after the first or second date, perhaps after sex, the boy / girl does not call, “disappears”, then a healthy, NOT neurotic reaction - should immediately lose interest in this relationship. But no! For a neurotic, this is the beginning of great love. Because as a child he also wondered where everything had gone, and also ran after his parents, trying to get their attention. As a result, in this psyche, love rests on feelings of resentment, humiliation and self-pity. And the one who causes all these feelings - arouses interest, sexual attraction, feelings ...
11. Love is related to need repeat childhood experiences. And for many it is suffering. Love is always a repetition of children's emotions.
12. How to understand that this man is normal and suitable for you? The answer is very simple: when you realize that you are not suffering in a relationship, you are comfortable and pleasant with a man and it does not require any effort from you. You are not working on relationships, you are not looking for the causes of problems, because you have no problems.
13. Normal person does not continue relationships that do not respect him. However, he will not even start them.
14. Decide on marriage, family, children need to with who YOUR on a sensual, emotional and sexual level. Everything should be together! And for this, harmony must be within you.
15. If you have a lot of money, they will love them and not you. Is always!
16. If you want to get married, meet or even live together for six months or a year, and nothing happens, you need to ask once, does he want a family and a wedding. If a man is not ready to start a family, then it's time to say goodbye to him. In good, of course. Like "I am very warm to you and will continue in the same spirit, but away from you."
17. In the family are both people each other for joy. If a person sees in another not happiness, but an aggregate for performing certain functions, then this is the finish.
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18. Any - and I emphasize this - any woman who stays at home for years and only deals with housekeeping and children is degrading. It's unavoidable. In the end, a man getting bored with his wife, he begins to consider her stupid, and there he is half a step before the divorce. And note: initially the man did not insist on anything, this woman happily clapped her hands and decided to stay at home.
19. There are no happy meetings absolutely nothing random. People who are ready for this meeting meet their ideal partner: they have sorted out with themselves, with their childhood injuries and complexes, have gone through and got rid of hard neuroses, they know what they want from life and from the opposite sex, and they do not have serious conflicts with themselves. Otherwise, each new relationship becomes a test of strength for both participants and inevitably ends in mutual disappointment and new complexes.
20. If he annoys you, just part with it. Do not be afraid to be alone. Not a single man in the whole world is worth breaking himself, caving in on him, neglecting his desires and needs. No one.